Wings and Chains

I always see this strange happening in my life.God gives me wings to fly and people try to chain me to earth, telling me that I have no right to fly.
How do I loose right to fly?
Am I always to be driven by my circumstances and not by my wish.
It is said that we should not have a wish that can harm other, but how does my wish to fly harm others.Why should I be one chained down because I am surrounded by people who have no wish to fly? Can I not fly alone?
I am as it is a loner so I need to be allowed live my dream the way I want.

human and parents: Faith and Happiness

human and parents: Faith and Happiness: I was very upset as the dreams and aspirations I had pinned all my hopes on had dashed. I was absolutely devastated. The whole situation se...

Faith and Happiness

I was very upset as the dreams and aspirations I had pinned all my hopes on had dashed. I was absolutely devastated. The whole situation seemed so bizarre as if it was just created to teach me a lesson.
The start of the happening was not my doing as it was beyond my imagination to even think that I deserve this opportunity.The way and at speed it progressed was worth watching as if some force was pushing it towards a most beautiful possible end.The whole process was neat without any error.There was no regret in the proceeding, no where was space to improve as there was no flaw, an excellent performance right through.And guess what the success was nearly yes nearly guaranteed.
Then as it had started mysteriously, the same way it ended and I was left totally at lose as to why was I put through all this.Why was I taken to such a height and then unceremoniously dropped? This did not only hurt me mentally but also physically as the pain was so real that I could feel it.
More than the pain was the hurt that my God had let me down.Why when I had not even asked for this gift did He present it in front of me and then took it away.The more I thought , the more agitated I became as I could not get my answer.
Then I read a beautiful article today that gave me all my answers.

God wanted me to realise that it is waste to make any event so important to us that it consumes us.Nothing is permanent, not even the happiness that I had associated with the success of this event.So I should not waste my time in looking for happiness in worldly gains and also His time in teaching me these lessons again and again...

Wait and Pray

In many or in fact in all situations there is as much we can do as human. In any given situation we can do our best or we might fall short of our expectations. In either case we cannot do much.Our role is limited to being ready with our best preparations , but whether we will be allowed to deliver our best is dependent on decisions beyond us.
So every time we are in position of wait and pray.
Wait, because we have to wait for the opportunity to knock at our door. You can be proactive to create opportunities but without you ever realising it , in actual your pro activeness is also planned by forces beyond you .
Then once the action is done by us, we have to pray for the best results.
This a regular recurring  behaviour of every human.
Check for yourself.

Destiny and Design

I am still at lose to realise that why do we come so close to success and then not achieve it. Why are we sent on that path on the first go? Maybe to learn new lessons or to learn how to do better next time? No idea, but it is tough to accept failure. And what ever may all the great seers say accepting failure takes time .You tend to ponder over and over as to what you could have done better. How you pray for another chance to do it best. But as they say opportunity lost is lost for ever.
So now what? We sit and wallow or we roll up our sleeves and get ready to meet next opportunity.
In fact this is the time when you realise that there is a strong power beyond us controlling our destiny. We do not even realise when we turn our opportunity to failure, however hard we try.

human and parents: Hope and Happening

human and parents: Hope and Happening: I sometimes feel I am a beyond repair positive.I am the kind of person who at the time of holocaust even when being taken to gas chamber wo...

Hope and Happening

I sometimes feel I am a beyond repair positive.I am the kind of person who at the time of holocaust even when being taken to gas chamber would hope for miracle to happen. I sometimes wonder at this thought process of mine.Is it positivism or non acceptance of reality?
Man! you are being taken to gas chamber so you are guaranteed to be gassed so where is the hope?
But! no , my mind will create a complete happy ending package for the same.I shall not accept defeat till its right staring in my face.So am I on the right path or as I mentioned, maybe I am too scared to face the truth.
I always hope against hope for success.My cool, calculative mathematical mind tells me that it is not possible to attain this but I still go ahead and give it a shot. Some I win some I loose.
But my spirit is still young and ready to fly as I have still not reached the home.

human and parents: Parents and Self Pity

human and parents: Parents and Self Pity: This is an interesting fact but true for most of the parents.We always fell and are absolutely sure that we have not got a decent deal as p...

Aspiration and Self

Our hopes and aspirations are endless.They are like a mountain hike we feel we will reach the top just around the next corner but then there is another winding road beyond.The same goes for our aspirations,I recall, some 22-23 years ago when I had just started working I had felt if I get PGT scale in a decent school that would be the high point of my life.there I was so contended for next few years that I have reached the pinnacle of success and there was nothing more to gain.Then came the period where I compared the packages given by other schools.This has been an endless journey which is still on.On the contrary I have a friend who is so contended with her job front that even when "Somebody moves Her Cheese" she resolutely waits for things to settle back and does not bother to move her self. (I am talking about the famous book by Spencer Johnson "Who moved my cheese", )She is still very very comfortably working at the place of work I have left her and mind you she is happy there.She has no issues about growing up, reaching next level, expanding her horizon ..... I have all this endless jargon to explain my continuous movement in search of my aspiration which changes with every next step.So who is happier? Needless to say my friend but who is having more fun and challenge?Me of course!

So which path is correct?

Free fall and Human

When you are touched by the unreal elements you are left to ponder whether you are really able to control even basic events in your life.Do things really move in accordance with our thought process.If not then what are we worried about and what can we alter by our intervention.
Here I am not trying to say we stop doing action.We need to do action as per the thought process that takes place in our mind but we need not regret our actions or go over them again and again, thinking of ways in which we could have improved them.Yes learning from our actions has to be certainly carried forward but not guilt.
This also brought another thought that we miss many opportunities in our life by just mulling over the results that event can get us.Again here I am not talking about actions that can be harmful to anybody , but actions that could be a new beginning.We scare our selves into inaction by just working over and over it in our brain.Let us sometimes go with the flow and see how events have been planned to fall into there places by forces beyond us.It will be like going through a fancy film where the next event is already planned but will unfold only when due.

So sometimes try to take free fall in life ....

 

Human and Separation

When do we decide we had enough of the person in our life.Sometimes we keep on with same people just because we are too scared to change. Change not the person but our way of life.We just keep on with situations w should have walked out long ago in pretext that this is the best one can ask for.We sell ourselves too short.
I would not say we walk out of any situation if things start going wrong but we need to access if we are facing the same scenario again and again.We need to pull ourselves and say no to rubbish being dished out.Here I am not talking of physical abuse at all but mental torture we inflict on ourselves .We assume we can handle it. We feel that this is in no way harming us not realising that every time we even twitch our face with distaste, our body records it and creates anti acids to combat the eventuality.

We deserve better as human.

Forgive and Forget

"To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover that the

 prisoner was you." --Louis B. Smedes

I have been thinking of all the thoughts that are holding me prisoner.I have been asking myself can I set myself free of all those memories which every time bring pain and hopelessness to me.In fact I realised that these memories set a chain reaction.As soon as I recall one many other pain full thoughts come back to haunt me.Then I drown into sea of compassion and self pity.I even cry my heart out sometimes.So when I thought of getting rid of all this some how the pleasure of  remembering  the pain and wallowing stopped me from doing that.Does this happen with you too? Do you also enjoy this trip of self pity? Is it not something like going on a ride where we know we shall be freaked out with fear but we still go as we enjoy the fear.

Think!!!!!

human and parents: Human and Natural Disaster

human and parents: Human and Natural Disaster: Whenever we hear of a natural disaster we read it as a statistical report, as to how many dead, how many dislodged and then we continue wi...

Human and Natural Disaster

Whenever we hear of a natural disaster we read it as a statistical report, as to how many dead, how many dislodged and then we continue with our life as usual.We never ever assume that we will ever be caught in the same.Somehow we are very confident that this could never touch us.

As the world is aware Kashmir in India is badly hit by floods.I had been following this news just like everybody else.Seeing news on television,talking about it at lunch, but was there any productive contribution from my side no not at all.In fact as I mentioned I am also complacent about thinking that though Kashmir is some 1000 km away from my place that this can never happen to me.

Yesterday during the night when I got up to go to washroom ,a thought stuck me that all those who are stuck at the top of their houses waiting for help cannot even hope for a simple convenience of going to toilet at their will.The thought sent a chill through me at my callous attitude of rejecting the whole thing as a statistics data. Somehow the magnanimity of  suffering had not touched me as I was so busy with my daily chores.The fact that each one there lost the chance of just doing their daily chores is a very very painful thought if you think about it.It will take each one of them minimum two to three years to just start off again ,let alone to get over their losses.Some will be scared for life as they will have lost not only their homes but members of home too.

I know even now I cannot do much for them except may be give financial help that too not worth a life but we all can pray for those who have lost their everything and that is what can be our contribution as human.

Let us all be more sensitive to pain of others. Let us be more concerned about the situations around us.

Mobile and Me

I had recently got a new mobile.My children while telling me the features also told me how I should always close the running applications which are not in use.They said it helps mobile to perform better.
We as human have so many applications running in our mind which we are not using any more.Do we ever get around to closing them. 
Grudge Application:There are so many grudges we hold in our mind, against the people who have done wrong to us, even when they are no longer part of our life.We think of them again and again and torture our selves with all that happened long ago.
Better Answer Application:This is our favourite. We mull over and over on our answer or handling of particular situation as to how we could have done it better.We even go step further to imagine the different result that would have come out of that situation due to the new answer we work out every time we think of it.

Choice Application: This is another one which is always active.We put everything from a pair of shoe to our hubby in this and think over and over how we could have made a better choice.

We need to learn to close all these applications as they are of no use anymore.However hard we try we cannot change our past.

Let us work towards a better future instead.

Parent as Teacher

Parent is always a teacher. He is a teacher that need not preach, but who is being observed very very carefully by his student i.e. his child. This child will absorb all he sees . He might not comment on your action, but trust me he is observing. He will be observing your behaviour with your parents,your sibling, your partner and world at large.He will observe your moral values,your behaviour with less fortunate,your way of handing tension,your eating-drinking-smoking habit.So to sum it up you are the actual teacher of your child ,the teacher he meets in school is a mere educationist and may be little beyond if she has that compassion and fire in her.But the whole shape of character of your child is dependent on you. You will have to do what you preach because child is very intelligent,he will realise the difference between your action and speech.So next time before ticking your child off at any of his unacceptable action,try to analyse where has the learning of this action come in.

So to build the character of your child first mend your own and behave every moment the way you would like him to become.

Parents and Hope

What defines hope of parents?

Is it based on critical analysis of the capability of your child?
Is it based on aspirations your child has planned for self?
Or
Is it based on the blind faith that my child is THE BEST ?

The relationship between child and parent is very strange.The parent always wants to give the world to his child and he also expects the best from his child.In this whole process the parent forgets the capability and limitations of his child.He forgets that there is a unique combination of chemicals that make each human being special.This applies to every human and that includes your child too.

The next common error is a mathematical calculation of genetic heritage.Yes it is true most of the time but it is not a certain happening.As parent we should be ready for the surprises packed by God for us.It can be more than our expectation or less than ours.

In all this never loose hope because hope is like a prayer we send out to Almighty, to support and fulfill our dreams.

Expectations and Parents

Who can define the level of expectation a parent should have from his kid ?

What can be the result of this expectation?

Will the expectation motivate the child to work harder to achieve it?

Will the thought of not been able to meet the expectation depress the child ?

Should the expectation be high and beyond so as to motivate the child to reach impossible?

Will a very high expectation , discourage the child?

I can keep on throwing end less questions at you, but the truth is this is not mathematics that will reach a particular situation which ever the way you go.This is reality which actually behaves very uncharacteristic.

You are always left with a bad feeling that had you put in a little more stress the result would have been different or had you taken some other path the result would have been positive.Well we all forget that whatever happens had to happen in that order only. We were supposed to behave in the order we did, the decisions were already laid out we just executed them.

So, stop traumatizing yourself and enjoy the journey called LIFE.